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Competitions are for chocolates, maybe a car. Not a wife.

11/2/2011

9 Comments

 
A New Zealand radio station, 'The Rock' is currently running a competition to win a Ukranian wife.  Yes indeed, a competition to win another human being.

I am appalled.

People in favour of the 'Win a Wife' competition have said "oh lighten up it's just a joke".  Would a competition to 'win a real African slave' be OK?  Treating other humans as commodities is not a joke.  Buying humans as part of a monetary transaction is never OK.

Others have pointed out that wife-buying is actually a social service - you know, 'rescuing' these poor women from their situations.  Kind of like buying child pornography helps feed and clothe the child 'models'?  If you really want to help Ukranian women, get in touch with the many international aid organisations and find out how to do this.

The other dismaying effect this competition has had is to legitimise the dehumanising of women. A quick look through The Rock's commentary on this competition, and the entrant's 'profiles' is profoundly depressing. Furthermore, the Ukranian 'jokes' stemming from this competition are extremely offensive to the Ukranian community.

I have been vocal in my opposition to this campaign, and have helped set up the Facebook campaign Stop The Rock's 'Win a Wife' campaign.  This has been live for only a matter of hours and the response has been incredible. If you also think the 'Win a Wife' competition is a world of wrong, please join us on the Facebook page. We are encouraging people to write to the radio station's advertisers to voice their dismay.

A number of people have written excellent posts on this topic and I encourage you to read them:
  • Women are not commodities - MP Carol Beaumont
  • Why the mail order bride competition is wrong
  • 'Win a Wife' - WTF?
  • Privileged desperate white male with superiority complex seeks subservient cleaner/cook/sex slave with unlimited faux appreciation
  • Win Some More White Heterosexual Cis-Male Privilege?
We have already had two big companies disassociate themselves from The Rock - ASB Bank and Lufthansa. Kudos to them! (And to all you fantastic people out their who are voicing your concerns to the advertisers!).

**Update 16/2/11: I want to clarify when I stand on this competition, as it seems some people are wildly generalising. I have not made any comment with regards to online dating, human trafficking, analogies with prostitution or about the situation faced by women in Ukraine. This is because I don't know enough about any of these topics to comment. Many people do know much more than me, and it's been interesting reading their commentary on various blogs and forums. I still haven't come to any conclusions myself on these, so I'll just keep learning.

I DO know where I stand on this issue though: women are not commodities to be won, and this competition is legitimising the degradation of women in New Zealand, that old notion of women as second-class citizens. We're better than this New Zealand.
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The following is a letter to the NZ Broadcasting Standards Authority from the Embassy of Ukraine in Australia. (They don't have an embassy in NZ, so the Australian embassy acts on their behalf). 
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9 Comments
stef link
11/2/2011 12:53:13 pm

Awesome work and thanks for the shout out.

Reply
Mathew
12/2/2011 06:32:47 pm

Keeping in mind that I don’t necessarily support the promotion in question, as you've probably noticed that I’ve been posting on the Facebook Group’s wall for the past few hours (and I’ve a summarized opinion at https://www.facebook.com/topic.php?uid=125406027531398&topic=37). I speak on behalf of a bloke who *IS* an agent at Interpol in Ukraine.

As I've mentioned on the FB wall, I'm going to go out on a limb here and suggest that you're a misandrist, and you're against both dating and marriage - and judging by the content of your blog, I fear I may be right.

Most of what you’re saying here is simply UNTRUE. I have been to the Ukraine (my purpose was NOT to search for a wife – I’m happily engaged to an Indian woman whom I met under “normal” circumstances, thank you very much), and I have spoken to enough Ukrainian women (though not all of them, of course), and most of them DO NOT want to leave – contrary to popular beliefs.

Secondly, if they wanted to be prostitutes, in Ukraine they can take up that profession if they would like, just like NZ. My sources tell me that they earn the same or more than they do here – and in those coveted (for some reason) US Dollars, too.

Thirdly, these dating/marriage sites are NOT about human trafficking. Most of the stories you hear about HT are due to people following lucrative job offers and then being smuggled to other countries. That’s all done under false pretenses, whereas women who sign up to these agencies do not do it under duress, and not many of them are economically disadvantaged.

The fallacy that women from the CIS marry for money and/or green cards is limited to a select few, and is the subject of fiction (movies and such) more than anything in real life.

Fourthly, the promotion is badly mislabeled. The competition flies a man to the Ukraine to meet a woman. There is no guarantee of marriage. If the pair end up having sex, then it MUST be consensual, otherwise the man WILL be severely punished. Rape carries a 5-year prison sentence, and if it’s done violently, even more.

Also of great importance is that a man with a criminal record (especially a violent one) will NOT be allowed to leave New Zealand. Period. And that’s even IF he managed to get a visa.

I could go on, but basically, there are simply too many innaccuracies in your argument, and while I support the basic principle of what you're doing here, and that the competition is ethically questionable, you really need to get your facts straight.

Reply
Rachel Hansen link
13/2/2011 03:36:53 am

Goodness, did you even read my blog post? My point is that BUYING HUMANS AS PART OF A MONETARY TRANSACTION OR WINNING THEM IN A COMPETITION IS NEVER OK.
I figure you are doing a generic copy/paste and sticking the same comment everywhere. So am not going to waste my time responding to these comments, as they are not relevant to the original post.
There is way too much derailing going on in this comment - http://www.derailingfordummies.com/.

And further personal insults will be deleted. (They don't bother me, we are gathering together quite a great collection, but I don't want my readers to be exposed to them too)

Reply
Gravey
15/2/2011 02:24:41 pm

Again, brilliant work. Finally made it over here to read.

If there is ever a reason why this "Stop" campaign is absolutely essential it is the sort of abusive comments the wonderful bloggers and moderators are receiving, and the sort of comments made in the applications for the competition.

The competition generates so much hatred, and when someone stands up and says "No" the pure evil of it all is only too plain to see.

Reply
Vicki Hill
16/2/2011 01:18:34 pm

Thank you Rachel. You and the co-moderators of the Stop the Win a Wife page are doing an extraordinary job. I joined when it was just over 200 "likes" and have watched the support grow.

It is people like you that give me hope amongst the low-quality media who cater constantly to the growing lowest-common denominator in this country.

The promotion The Rock is running is truly distasteful. Frankly I have been horrified. The lack of understanding and empathy it demonstrates is depressing AND distressing.

Thank you for your work.

Reply
Rachel Hansen
16/2/2011 03:20:08 pm

Thank you Gravey and Vicki, I am humbled. It's been wonderful connecting with great people such as yourselves!

Reply
Shannon
17/2/2011 02:26:10 am

Ah, I see. So there's definitely no freedom of speech in your world. And people can only have an opinion if it matches yours. That's a great philosophy to go by in your line of work!!
Again, The Rock FM are giving away a trip to the Ukraine...THAT'S IT!!!!
I don't know how people like you can be in the job you are. Someone so closed minded and reluctant to get all of your facts straight, how do you even function? Or is it that you've found out you were actually wrong and are now feeling supid? I guess then if that's the case, you can't really go back now can you? Only thing you can do is filter what you want people to see so no one knows what a right tool you actually are for jumping to such a horrendous conclusion.
The fact that you think 'NZ' can be that way inclined is an insult and quite frankly, you don't deserve to be here. Maybe you should move to the USA, at least there anyone can sue anyone for anything, no matter how pathetic. You'd be well suited there

Reply
Donna link
25/2/2011 07:47:39 am

The women I'm sure have a choice also in the matter. There are bigger issue's occurring currently in our own backyard. I'd rather focus on those.

Thanks

Reply
Rachel Hansen link
3/3/2011 07:10:39 am

@Donna - Thanks for your comment. I have never made comment on the situation of Ukranian women and whether or not they have a choice. I don't have enough knowledge of Ukraine, or the "mail order bride" industry to comment on this.
There are many issues throughout the world. This is certainly not the only campaign/issue I have been involved in. NZ is certainly going through a time or turmoil following the tragic events in Christchurch and I have been very active in my support here. (Details on my FB page)

@ Shannon - Kindly refer to my comments policy http://www.rachelhansen.org/blog-comments-policy.html. You also need to provide a valid email address.
I am absolutely fine in the knowledge that many people will not agree with me on this issue, and have had some great, reasoned debates with people about it.
Your comment is mindless and resorts to personal insults - not cool. Any further comments of this nature will not be published.

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    Rachel is a writer and educator whose fields of interest include sexuality education, gender, feminism and youth development.

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