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"So, what do you DO Rachel?"

7/4/2010

1 Comment

 
“What do you do?”

I lose track of how many times I am asked this in a week.  Maybe it has always been so, but I think previously my answer to this has been somewhat simpler, so I hadn’t noticed the regularity to which I was asked this.  At various times I have answered with: I am studying. I am a management consultant. I am a recruitment consultant. I am a children’s party fairy.  I am a surf lifeguard. I am a traveller. I am a counsellor. I am a teacher.I am trying to decide what I am going to be when I grow up.

But now, “what I do” is so much harder to define. A man asked me this question on Sunday. I mentioned a couple of things that I “do”, at which point he interrupted and said he didn’t need my CV.  I was a little taken aback – I had only just started! : )  I think that for this man, the question was a superficial nicety, he didn’t really want to know. Particularly once I had uttered the word ‘sexuality’...  

But it got me thinking – can I sum up “what I do” in a short, concise socially acceptable sentence?   I thought long and hard, and decided “no”.  But I did think that it was a good topic for a blog post.  I am just getting started in the blogosphere and I thought it would be apt to define “what I do” at this early stage.

First and foremost, I am a mother.  This is my most important role and the one that will always take priority – for the rest of my life.  This is my grounding principal and I will never apologise to anyone if this role interrupts other things I am ‘supposed’ to be doing. Being a mother is a huge privilege and my child only has one of me. (NB. The value our society places on this role is a whole post in itself, coming soon!)

I provide education around sexuality - I teach in schools, I run workshops for parents and youth.  I want every person to love, value, respect and understand their whole body.

I write. I am currently writing for Birthright NZ, redeveloping their website and increasing their profile.   I love it that my work will help and raise awareness of the fantastic job that so many one-parent families are doing around the country.

I educate and empower local business women with their online presence and run workshops on social media.  This was something that evolved, rather than a conscious decision to get involved in this area. It is so rewarding to see women who had shied away from such things become confident and innovative online networkers.  

I mentor young women.  This is a huge privilege and one of the most inspiring parts of any week.

I read. Current topics of interest are body image and the media... advertising to youth... the sexualisation of children... alcohol and pregnancy... how social media can help not-for-profits and small businesses... worm farming... sustainable living.

And now... I blog.  Increasingly so. My goal is three posts a week.  Help keep me honest ; )
1 Comment
Bianca Beauchamp
8/4/2010 02:11:11 am

Isn't this a wonderfully interesting question! I think you are right about people asking this question as a social norm, I think they are very rarely interested in hearing the answer, and are mostly in it to check me out, do i measure up, and how i answer will determine how they respond to me (openly and with interest, or closed and disinterested)

An old friend of mine (ex-boyfriend) who owns his own successful business when answering this question would sometimes answer 'I sell toilet paper'! Now this was only a small portion of his business, dealing in paper goods, yet he often felt the question was a loaded one, wrought with snobbery, and he didn't often wish to play this game. The response he got was often 'oh' ending the conversation. Some people would go on politly, and some believe it or not actually found this interesting, or saw through his response and with interest, persued the conversation to deepen it. I am imagining that it would be similar to the response a stay at home mum gets when responding to 'what do you do?' with 'I'm a mum' (I am looking forward to you delving into this one, I personally find it fascinating, how the most important job of all seems to have become so unappreciated and unimportant) Perhaps we could call this role 'a child's 'life' educator', I guarantee this will draw more interest than 'I'm a mum' Lets get creative!

Fabulous article thank you Rachel, I'm looking forward to the next.



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    Rachel is a writer and educator whose fields of interest include sexuality education, gender, feminism and youth development.

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